Grade School Wisdom

July 15, 2008 (PLANSPONSOR ((b)lines) - Moscow citizens are Mosquitoes? Janitors are a main cause of dust?

The quote “Kids say the darnedest things,” applies to this list of answers one Web site claims grade school students have given to teachers:

  • The future of “I give” is “I take.”
  • The parts of speech are lungs and air.
  • The inhabitants of Moscow are called Mosquitoes.
  • A census taker is man who goes from house to house increasing the population.
  • A virgin forest is a forest where the hand of man has never set foot.
  • The general direction of the Alps is straight up.
  • A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water then forcing it through an aviator.
  • Most of the houses in France are made of plaster of Paris.
  • The people who followed the Lord were called the 12 opossums.
  • The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top and you sit on the bottom.
  • We do not raise silk worms in the United States , because we get our silk from rayon. He is a larger worm and gives more silk.
  • One of the main causes of dust is janitors.
  • A scout obeys all to whom obedience is due and respects all duly constipated authorities.
  • One by-product of raising cattle is calves.
  • To prevent head colds, use an agonizer to spray into the nose until it drips into the throat.
  • The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
  • The climate is hottest next to the Creator.
  • Oliver Cromwell had a large red nose, but under it were deeply religious feelings.
  • The word trousers is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom. ( Editor’s note: This is true, think about it. )
  • Syntax is all the money collected at the church from sinners.
  • In spring, the salmon swim upstream to spoon.
  • Iron was discovered because someone smelt it.
  • In the middle of the 18th century, all the morons moved to Utah.
  • A person should take a bath once in the summer, not so often in the winter.