SURVEY SAYS: Believe it or Not…

April 1, 2010 ( - It’s April Fool’s Day, of course – and on that day it can be difficult at times to figure out whether someone is pulling your leg or not.

In fact, it’s not unheard of for news organizations to post up a fake news story as a joke. This week, as a bonus question, I asked readers to offer up their idea of an  April Fools’ headline – something that is plausible, but not quite yet believable….      

Here’s what our readers came up with”

Jesse James and Tiger Woods are going into business together as James Woods Inc.  (disclaimer–not associated with the actor James Woods) since they have all their “flames” idle now that they both have been caught with their pants down (literally and figuratively).  Their business model is to ‘promote’ their many paramours to men in the market for ‘extracurricular’ activities.  Their motto is…”Need a discrete (at least till you get caught) companion?  Come on down to James Woods Used Har Lot!”

Nancy Pelosi resigns as House speaker amidst controversy of bribery allegations and fraud.

The President and Democratic congressional leaders will meet next week to discuss possible broadening of the provisions to the PPACA & HCEAA (while they still have control of the House & Senate).

Dow breaks 14000 again!!!


Democrats say it’s time for Americans to start taking responsibility for their own lives.”

Health Care Bill Was Early April Fool’s Joke!

“Alien Creatures Found in House and Senate – Who are they?  Why are they there?”

Congress Passes Cult Reform!  Mandates that everybody drinks the Kool-Aid.

Dick Cheney Visited by Angels – Repents Torture Role

“Health Care Reform Bill Passes”.  I wish that was an April Fool’s joke, but the joke is on us.

Local Woman Wins Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes, Quits Job to Live her REAL Life.

Rising Tide of Negative Sentiment Causes Obama to Come Clean

"The federal government has announced the suspension of all the rules of Economics 101 (you know, supply and demand relationships, borrowed money is not income, money reinvested will grow, general growth in the economy is accomplished only if you have reinvestment, a borrower is slave to the lender, etc.)

"Michelle Obama is Expecting December 23rd (9 months after passage of the health care reform bill.)

Republicans in congress change mind on Health Care, say they misread page 2 of 2000 page bill.

World Economies Agree to Mulligan

LENO BRINGS BACK CONAN AS GUEST (Arnold Schwarzenegger, star of the Conan movies)

U.S. Military is Tracking nuclear missile launched by IRAN towards United States!!

Eliot Spitzer and Tiger Woods team up to promote a program aimed at teaching young men about the benefits of monogamy!

BREAKING NEWS -- America is Bankrupt!!

Supreme Court orders all U.S. Congress to go out and work in "real world" for 90 days.  Private employers lock door and quickly post "Not hiring" signs.

CONGRESS ENACTS NEW FIDUCIARY LAW: All calling themselves "Advisors" deemed fiduciaries, all others to be called "Brokers" ([ICI cals hails "... victory for funds, fund managers, fund executives and customers.")

MY favorites were these:

President Obama Expands Offshore Oil Drilling (say what?!?)

"No problems found with Toyota gas pedals - investigation results revealed drivers did not apply brakes."

But this week’s Editor’s Choice goes to the reader who said, “Who needs fake headlines?  Looking at the real headlines these days makes me think every day is April Fools' Day!”

Thanks to everyone who participated in this week’s bonus April Fool’s headlines survey!