SURVEY SAYS: Who Has Influenced Your Work Persona Most?

May 11, 2006 (PLANSPONSOR.com) - We're all influenced to some extent by how we were raised - but this week we asked readers, when it comes to the person they are at WORK, who were they most like.

Sunday may be Mother’s Day, but when it comes to parental models, Dad’s influence was most cited – by some 30% of this week’s respondents.   A nearly equal number ( 28.79% ) said their workplace persona was influenced equally by their mother and father, while just about one-in-five ( 21% ) cited Mom’s influence as dominant.   Rounding out the responses, we had nearly 17% who said neither (generally some other family member was cited or, in some cases, the respondents just felt like who they were at work bore little reflection on either parent), and the remaining 3% said “other.”

Some selected verbatims:

Dad:

“At least I try to be – he is a natural leader, a common man with uncommon intelligence and a wonderful sense of humor!”

“I am grateful to my mother for teaching us about everyday household things, but it was my father who taught us how to conduct ourselves in life.”

“My father, unfortunately — my goal is to become a recovering workaholic.”

“She worked all her life…set high standards for herself and us.   I would like to think the process continues to work in my family.”

“I loved both my parents dearly, but it was my mother who kept the wheels turning in our lives.”

“I am more like my Mother at work.   I haven’t yet learned to say no to another task…this is why I have five brothers!”

“At work, I am (c) an even mixture. He definitely had the business mind and was very good at buckling down and getting things done. My mom, although she is a very hard worker, tends to be more social. Enter me!”

“My dad is an ADD (we’re convinced!) insurance salesman, and my mom is a methodical elementary school teacher.   I ended up being a methodical 401(k) sales rep…who knew?”

“Both – a loving attitude towards people and able to see the whole picture (mother), with a thoughtful focus on the details (father) – at least, that’s who I try to be.”

“My business life is so very different from either my mother’s or my father’s.   They never had to make the kinds of decisions I have to make each day.   Their work lives were much, much simpler and the work decisions more straightforward.”

“My granddad; the first 18 years of my life and the last 18 years of his life, he lived with us and we shared the same bedroom. We worked and played together, and I never saw him angry at anyone. So it is hard for me to be angry, upset or stressed at work or anywhere because older folks have a soothing effect on you. Now let me tell you how much I love Mom & Dad….”

“In work and most other aspects, I seem to be vastly different from my whole family.   I definitely seem to march to a different drummer.”

And then there were some that we could all relate to:

“I’ve been thinking about this so long I missed the deadline. Not because I couldn’t answer the question – but because the answer scared the h.ell out of me!   I’m like my MOTHER at work! Augh! Help! When did this happen? What do I do? Sound the alarm!”

“At work, I am more like my father (b), but I definitely have my mother’s thighs!”

But this week’s Editor’s Choice goes to the reader who said, “My parents were such opposites, I’m surprised that I’m even here.”

Thanks to everyone who participated in our survey!

I've always instructed my husband to shoot me if I become like my mother, but I'd have to say, in many ways, I'm more like her at work. While she drives me crazy, I also admire many of her qualities; like her work ethic, loyalty, and strength. So I certainly like to think that I resemble her in some of those ways.


At work, I am (c) an even mixture. He definitely had the business mind and was very good at buckling down and getting things done. My mom, although she is a very hard worker, tends to be more social. Enter me! I can definitely buckle down and do my fair share of socializing but I tend to fall closer to my dad when at work.


My answer is D - neither one but with one small caveat so maybe it really should be other.   My business life is so very different from either my mother's or my father's.   They never had to make the kinds of decisions I have to make each day.   Their work lives were much, much simpler and the work decisions more straightforward.   The one thing that would be the same as both my parents is the value placed on living an ethical life in business or anywhere else.  


(e) My granddad, the first 18 years of my life and the last 18 years of his life, he lived with us and we shared the same bedroom. We worked and played together and I never saw him angry at anyone. So it is hard for me to be angry, upset or stressed at work or anywhere because older folks have a smoothing effect on you. Now let me tell you how much I love Mom & Dad..........

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(c) An even mixture.   My mom's a type A, driven and focused executive while my dad is more laid back, the kind of guy who can spend a month of Sundays just visitin'. I think I combine both - use the organization and goal-orientation skills from my mom to get the work done, but also have the personal schmoozing side that comes into play when interacting with a variety of employees.

Interesting question for the survey because if you had asked which parent am I most like at home, that would be easy to answer - my mom.


(d) Neither one (I hope)


C - Both!   My dad is an ADD (we're convinced!) insurance salesman and my mom is a methodical elementary school teacher.   I ended up being a methodical 401(k) sales rep...Who knew?


In my work personae I am like neither my Mother nor my Father.   I am wise like Solomon, strong like Hercules, analytical like Pythagoras, inventive like Da Vinci, devil-may-care like Dean Martin and handsome beyond compare.......or at least that's what Momma told me.   She's getting a swell gift on Sunday.


Personality wise like mother, work ethic like dad


In choosing between the two parents, I would have to say my father.   But the real answer is (e) other.   In work and most other aspects, I seem to be vastly different from my whole family.   I definitely seem to march to a different drummer.


I am b) more like my father....his business ethics are....we don't call in, we do our work, and we drag ourselves in no matter how sick we are!!


My work ethic definitely mirrors my dad's ('b"), but the rest of my work style really resembles neither ("d").   My dad never took a sick day, and was a very hard worker.   His kids took this as the norm, and I'm still VERY surprised to see how far from the norm it really is, but glad he instilled it in me.


(a) My mother. She was an organized, stubborn, curious person who always wanted to know "why".   I'm the same way.   In fact I sometimes get in trouble for asking to many questions about why things are done the way they are when they don't work!


My parents were such opposites, I'm surprised that I'm even here. My dad was gregarious, outgoing and talented in many ways outside of work. My mom was intelligent, shy and to the grindstone. I wound up with some of the good, the bad and the ugly of each. Sometimes I look up from my desk with a mischievous smile on my face.


When it comes to the person I am at WORK - I am more like (a) my mother.   I am definitely not like my father.   I'm still trying to figure out why my mother ever married him.


At work, I am more like my father (b), but I definitely have my mother's thighs!


I am definitely a) more like my mother, though the circumstances are now very different for me.   She is now 67 and still in the workforce having started a new job recently heading up a homeland security volunteer training task force (or something like that) for several counties.   At 35, having been a stay-at-home mom for years, she was a female in the male dominated work place when male coworkers felt they should buy her lunch if they went to McDonalds and weren't sure they knew what to do with a woman manager when she was promoted.   She was definitely a pioneer and can attest to many changes in her working years. In my 25 years in the workforce, I have even seen a change in the way men and women work together.   I've managed a team of men with no thoughts about what gender any of us were, at least not to my knowledge, and none of them would have EVER thought to have bought my lunch, although they would have brought me coffee on the way back from the pot. (That was a mutual thing.)   Mom is a very young "senior" and will probably work doing something until she dies because she enjoys being busy.   I'm not sure I have the same motive, but she's been a great resource for me as a business mentor, as well as a great mom.


b) Father, at least I try to be - he is a natural leader, a common man with uncommon intelligence and a wonderful sense of humor!


I would have to say a mix.   My Mom (love her dearly) is hyper-manic and always ready to boil over.   My Dad never gets emotional or excited (which makes him the perfect Methodist Minister).   I would like to think I fall between the two of them, but that may be just wishful thinking!


Definitely (b), my father.   Mom's much nicer than I am at work.


b) I am more like my father.     I am grateful to my mother for teaching us about everyday household things, but it was my father who taught us how to conduct ourselves in life.


A combination of "(C) an even mixture" for personality and intelligence, and "(D) neither one" for the actual job: my parents are in social services (adoption/nursing), and I'm in financial services.   Definitely a contrast between socialism and capitalism.  


My father, unfortunately -- my goal is to become a recovering workaholic.


B) My Father (who was the VP Personnel for ITT Financial 20 years ago) with tendencies of my mother who is very particular!  

No I guess I take it back my mother who worked full-time as a RN as a single parent (back in the days when that was unheard of).   My mother's work ethic is the reason I have the drive to work hard, yet I am blessed to share the parenting with my husband!   


First, I have to say that my mother is a great Mom.   However, I don't think she was ever a very good employee.... so I hope the answer is (b) my father.


Probably a combination of both...I have to listen to everyone's problems like my mom probably did, but I have the hard work ethic of my father!   Seems like double duty to me?


More like my Dad.   Hard charger.


(d) Neither one.   Primarily because the work environment has changed so much over the past 30 years.  


Thankfully, my answer is C- a mixture of the two. I like to think I took the best qualities from each of their "work" personalities.


Denial!   What a totally scary thought!   It had better be neither!


a) My mother.   I have a tendency to procrastinate - like my father, but as he owned his own business he could do what he wanted . . . at his own expense of course.   My mother was a stay-at-home mom whose "work" consisted of preparing meals for the elderly and transporting them to doctor's appointments, etc . . . . Essentially she was able to pick and choose what she wanted to take on. . .I don't have that luxury, but I do have the flexibility to make a decision each day about what I want to work on and the order in which to do it - unless my boss decides differently! But in the end I get done what I need to, and put my passion and energy into those things I believe in or care about the most - which is the pattern I believe my mother followed.   I loved both my parents dearly, but it was my mother who kept the wheels turning in our lives.


I would say (c) an even mixture.   I have my dad's sense of humor (I think) and love of a good time, and my mom's work ethic and ability to solve problems.   It's a balance that has worked for 25 years!


(c)      Both --- a loving attitude towards people and able to see the whole picture (mother), with a thoughtful focus on the details (father) -- at least, that's who I try to be


I chose C- even mixture...my parents are honest, hard working people who never trampled on others to progress their careers.   I have a brother and two sisters and we all have been very successful in our careers and we attribute this to the work ethics and values that we were taught.


I believe I got my ability to listen to my clients from my mother (since we all know that most men are not great listeners :-), my desire to succeed in business from my father, and my work ethic from both of them.


I am more like my Mother at work.   I haven't yet learned to say no to another task............this is why I have 5 brothers!


A.   Mother.   She worked all her life…set high standards for herself and us.   I would like to think the process continues to work in my family


I'm the admin, so Mom's traits serve me best at work.   Although the guys I support probably wish I was more like Dad, little do they know, they need Mom.   🙂


That's a great question!   I would say I'm an even mixture of both.   My parents work together in their own business out of their home and my dad is a tax advisor and my mom does the administrative work for him.   They are both pleasant and chatty with people both in person and on the phone (like I am J) and very much people pleasers.   But they are both equally extremely organized, which is also how I am at work.  

I just think that's a great question, I will be curious to hear some of the answers this week!  


d) Neither one.   My Mother never worked; tends to be quiet and shy.   My Father was an executive, but he rarely challenged the system.   He went along with things, moved up the ladder and was successful until he retired early caused by stress.   He smoked to relieve stress and died at age 59.   I, on the other hand, question everything and challenge people all the time.   I don't smoke nor do I take any prescription drugs; hopefully I will make it past 59.

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