SURVEY SAYS: Would These Headlines Fool You?

March 31, 2011 ( - Friday is April Fool’s Day, of course – and on that day it can be difficult at times to figure out whether someone is pulling your leg or not.  

In fact, it’s not unheard of for news organizations to post up a fake news story as a joke. This week, I asked readers to take a shot at crafting an April Fools’ headline (or two) – something that is plausible, but not quite yet believable…. 

See what you think….. 

Obama Resigns!!!!!

“PLANSPONSOR Editor Appointed Treasury Secretary

“World Peace breaks out in middle east

Walter Cronkite Revived to Instill Media Credibility

Celebrity and Sports Figures Just That – No More”

Health Care Reform Will Not Increase U.S. Debt

Baseball Season Opens for Those Who Can Afford It

HOUSE and SENATE agree to get along for one day. (okay I guess that isn’t really plausible)

Health Care Reform law abolished…..proven connection to law and higher health care costs


President Obama Recommends Repeal of Health Care Reform

"Federal Government Announces that Social Security and Medicare Are Fully Funded

Health Care Reform Has Cut Medical Costs by ____%"

Union officials declare..."Some teachers and workers grossly overpaid."

Congress Apologizes for Health Care Reform

"State of North Carolina to begin their own state currency in 2012. (Playing on recent article regarding Rep.Glen Bradley).

Just thought this was so ridiculous that some will want to chase......"

"Federal government votes in three day weekends to reduce budget.

Abolishment of abortion under President Santorum increases Social Security coffers and welfare rosters."

"Fidel Castro awarded Nobel Peace Prize.



Space Shuttle to Attempt Lunar Landing on Last Mission.

oh no - not again - a potential 6-to-12 inch snowstorm in highly populated Northeast cities.

Health Care Reform Repealed

"In entertainment news...

Charlie Sheen goes grocery shopping naked. Innocent bystanders forever blinded."

"IRS to reveal new source of taxable income

The IRS mandate requiring employers to add insurance costs per employee to the employee's IRS Form W-2 has resulted in a finding that employee taxpayer's receive billions of dollars each year in untaxed income. Beginning in tax year 2012, this imputed income will now be a taxable event for the employee.

Gosh - maybe this isn't a fake headline - it sounds to far-fetched to be fiction under this administration. Scratch this entry -"

there has finally been a real break through in the economy and there are indications that it is moving upward consistently and permanently.  In addition, the House and the Senate finally got some things accomplished to move the country forward.

AT&T Announces Earth 100 Coverage - No More Dead Zones or Dropped Calls

"New Government Retirement Plan: U.S. Will Acquire All Walmarts, Dennys


Dennys Reintroduces Bottomless Coffee For Seniors Employed by Walmart"

American Troops Invade Iran

Rush Limbaugh acknowledges Democrats might have gotten something correct at some time.

Charlie Sheen announces his candidacy for US President.

Boy trapped in refrigerator, eats own foot."

News from Japan is anything but good for the rest of the world.  Japan's problems are becoming other countries concerns with the spread of radioactivity. US officials are contemplating dispensing potassium iodine to US citizens in Hawaii and the western states as a precautionary measure. Officials are concerned about the quantity of potassium iodine on hand; is there sufficient inventory?

"Moammar Gadhafi to Replace John Galliano as Christian Dior Chief Designer

Charlie Sheen Announces Plans to Shut the Hell Up Already"

Secret Commercial Space Ship with 10 Passengers on Board Lands on the Moon!

Charlie Sheen announces exploratory committee for possible 2012 presidential bid

Treasury and GAO errors....United States has surprisingly large surplus.  Flat 10% tax rate for all. Free heatlhcare for everyone, including some well-deserved massages, Botox and other spa services for those in benefits management.



"U.S. Military Makes Early Withdrawal from Middle East - Leaving Affected Countries Unsatisfied"

Sweet Revenge -- Cleveland Cavs Beat Miami Heat      (oh, wait.... that's for REAL!)

"Glenn Beck Leaves Fox to Run for President (one can wish, no?)

Will African Birth Certificate End Obama's Presidency?

Supreme Court Finds Federal Income Tax Unconstitutional!"

Congress votes to fund war efforts in Libya, Iraq and Afghanistan by liquidating all ERISA plans

TIC-TAC-TOE CHICKEN WINS TEXAS HOLD'EM TOURNAMENT - Calls on Aces and Facecards; Folds on Rest

Rush Limbaugh's Birth Certificate from Mexico!

"Country in Debt; Congress takes pay cut!

Government Goes Retro and Let's the People Decide!

Job Crisis is Over! - Companies Bring Manufacturing and Off-shored Jobs Back to the U.S.!"



Scientists declare man-made climate change a reality (oh wait, they really do believe that's true)

"Headline:  First Time in History - Women Equally Represented In C-Level Jobs

Subheadline:  Most Paid as Well or Better than Male Counterparts"

Congress discontinued current medical benefits; members now covered under Medicare

Obama administration kills 401(k) plans, says they only benefit the rich.

"Headline:  Social Security offers early retirement window. 

Story:  In a bid to help reduce the unemployment rate, Social Security will be allowing people as young as age 55 to retire with full benefits, including eligibility for Medicare.  By letting these people retire, the number of job-seekers from this age cohort will be reduced as well as provide incentives to those still employed to leave the workforce and open up a job for younger people."

Donald Trump's comb-over hairstyle is fake!  Underneath that comb-over cap, is a full head of dark brown hair, much like that of Dr. McDreamy!  The "uncovered" Trump's comment to his exposed fake comb-over -- "any publicity is good publicity, when you say comb-over, who is the first person that comes to mind?"


"Congress to Streamline §401(k) Plan Administration by adding §ID(10)(T)… (remove the parentheses)"

The Cubs win the 2011 World Series

Charlie Sheen Unable to Speak After Being Struck by Lightning

Wisconsin Legislature's Democrats Join Public Employees Union

Republicans and Democrats in Congress declare April 1 to be a day of total cooperation

Federal pension plan converted to a cash balance plan with wearaway; IRS actuaries irate"

"""Obama wins the lottery, can now afford own healthcare""

or maybe just

""Economy showing strong signs of improvement, companies optimistic"" is just far-fetched enough!"

Obama and Congress agree to PPA as and when enacted.

Donald Trump shot dead!  Lone gunman attacks after losing fortune at Atlantic City casino!



That said, these were MY favorites....

"President Declares All Citizens Must Participate In New Health Care Plan - Congress Begins Impeachment Hearings

Forecast calls for another foot of snow.  (Oh, yeah, that wouldn't actually be a joke here in Western Massachusetts...)

"Gaddafi steps down from Libyan post, will tour with Lady GaGa

Al Gore declares global warming a hoax, will become CEO of Exxon"

Nevin Adams named by President Obama to the newly created cabinet position of Czar of Retirement. 

Scientist Discovers Who ""They"" Are.

IRS/DOL Announce No New Regulations For 2012

U.S. Corporations Confirm That All Defined Benefit Plans are now 100% Funded

Survey Shows that 401(k) Participants Make Intelligent Investment Decisions"

Federal Government Shut Down by Budget Impasse.  Nobody Notices.

President Signs Bill Eliminating 401(k) Testing."

"Cubs WIN World Series!

"Treasury publishes Code Section 125 final regulations

Anonymous donor donates a nuclear power plant to Japan"

But this week's Editor's Choice goes to this headline....

Supreme Court Rules That All Federal Laws Must be Accurately Named (a la The Pension “Protection” Act, The Patient Protection and “Affordable” Care Act) 

Thanks to everyone who participated in our survey!